To Whom It May Concern:
Over the last two decades, the World Association of Organic Chemists (WAOC) has noticed the misuse, and frankly the misappropriation, of the term “organic” by hippies and pseudo-hippies. At first we thought the mislabeling of food stuffs was funny. Seeing “100% Organic” stamped on fruit juice, bread and even beer always made us chuckle. Of course fruit juice is organic – it’s got carbon in it!
The “organic” mislabel stopped being funny when college students did not understand how the polystyrene lab was an organic chemistry experiment because the end product was, in one student’s words, “a fake plastic”. We at WAOC realized the hippies and pseudo-hippies had entirely co-opted “organic” when the hippie definition of “organic” was listed BEFORE the actual definition of “organic” in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary.
Due to the confusion and rampant misuse of the term “organic”, the WAOC is limiting its use. The term “organic” can only be applied to “substances that contain carbon.” Thus, the majority of food stuffs are organic. [Practically speaking, the only major inorganic food stuff most of us eat is table salt.]
WAOC suggests hippies and pseudo-hippies transition to the use of the terms “ecological” and “conventional”, rather than “organic” and “non-organic”. WAOC understands this transition will take some time. As such, WAOC is providing one year for this transition to occur.
Please contact WAOC with any questions or for suggestions in how to correctly use the term “organic”.
Regards,Pho Shur, PhD President World Association of Organic Chemists
This letter is absolutely not from the WAOC, which as far as the actual author knows, doesn’t actually exist.