4 chemicals that can seriously f*ck you up (or save your life)

1. warfarin (aka “coumadin”)

warfarin

Found in: Rat poison

Also found in: medicine that could save your motherfucking life

This chemical helps prevents blood clots from forming. WHAT THE WHAT?” you might me saying, “I need to clot so I don’t bleed to death!” That, my friends, is a true fact.  BUT! If things go to clot cray cray…

…clots can break into pieces and travel in the blood stream, lodging in the heart (causing a heart attack), the lungs (pulmonary embolus), or the brain (stroke).

[excerpt from University of Michigan Hospitals and Health Centers 'Warfarin/Coumadin']

A bit of warfarin helps prevent that bullshit.  If you’re on warfarin, you’re under a doctor’s care and better do everything they damn well tell you.  This chemical is saving you from clot madness because it’s preventing clotting, a necessary bodily function. Dosage, follow-through, and follow-up are critical.

2. succinylcholine (aka “sux”)

succinylcholine

Found in: Murder plots

Also found in: medicine that could save your motherfucking life

This chemical paralyzes the muscles in your body from the outer extremities inwards. Sound terrifying? Damn right it does.  Deadly too, as the muscles helping you breathe will stop working.  Just how the hell is this going to save your motherfucking life?!

The administration of sux is part of the rapid sequence intubation (RSI) protocol, which means a medical team is actually trying to keep you alive – they’ve just got to paralyze you do to it.  If you’re being intubated, your airway is blocked and the RSI protocol is employed to get a breathing tube down your throat.  To get this tube in quickly, they’ll paralyze and sedate you.

Sedation means you won’t be conscious when the paralysis sets in.  Respiratory support means something will be breathing for you when the muscles involved in respiration stop working.  In 5 – 10 minutes, a clinical dose of sux wears off as it’s rapidly metabolized by your body.  The sedation will likely last longer.  The goal is that by the time you’re awake, your breathing has been stabilized and perhaps other medical issues have been (or are being) addressed. 

[excerpt from my blog post Killers that sux]

…and if you’ve been injected with sux without respiratory support and sedation?

3. Digoxin

digoxin

Found in: Suicidesunnoticed homicides, hands of serial killer nurse

Also found in: medicine that could save your motherfucking life

The heart is a muscle and sometimes it doesn’t work at Optimus Prime levels. Like a stoned dudebro at a DMB concert, sometimes your heart can’t get on the right beat. Digoxin is prescribed at low doses to treat congestive heart failure and abnormal heart rhythms (arrhythmias). This chemical chills out a speedy heart beat and boosts heart contraction strength.  This all sounds totes awesome, but… too much digoxin causes cardiac arrest which, YIKES!, could kill you.

4. atropine

atropine

Found in: The back-pocket of  historical and modern-day poisoners

Also found in: medicine that could save your motherfucking life

The fact that this chemical is found in a plant called ‘Deadly Nightshade‘ really underlines how fucking scary it is.

The symptoms of atropine poisoning were once summarised in the following way: hot as a hare, blind as a bat, dry as a bone, red as a beetroot, mad as a hatter.

[excerpt from Molecules of Murder: Criminal Molecules and Classic Cases by John Emsley]

Atropine fucks with your body temperature, vision (by causing your pupils to embiggen), salivary glands, blood vessels, and brain. Oh, and your heart. All of this can lead to some real damn unpleasantness, up to – and including – death.  Of course, atropine has been used to help manage certain Parkinson’s Disease symptoms, sort out cardiac arrhythmias, and serve as an antidote to nerve agents like sarin.

In conclusion…

The Persuaders – Thin Line between Love & Hate – Video (High Quality)

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All chemical structures are from ChemSpider
Jay-Z gif is from gifbase
Airplane! gifs from tumblr and persephonemagazine

 

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App, smapp. Only our flowchart tells you if you’re an old maid

According to Slate, a Time staffer has developedhandy Facebook app that tells you whether you are an old maid.  You don’t need another app on your device. You just need our flowchart. DONE.

old maid flowchart

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AARP logo from aarp.org
Old Maid playing card image from rekedar.wordpress.com
All other images from PowerPoint clipart
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Apology Bingo!

apology bingo updated
*Of course I was tempted to use ‘Womanspace’ instead of ‘Free space’!
**New updated bingo card replaces “I am truly sorry” with “I/we are not going to play the blame game”. 
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A note from a big meanie

We all know the deal.  Men and women can comport themselves in exactly the same fashion, but get labeled very differently.  Hell, Pantene did a commercial on that shit.

Labels Against Women | #ShineStrong Pantene

Men that take no bullshit are “tough” or “no-nonsense”.  Women that take no bullshit are “bitchy” or “mean”.  Many folks won’t call a women a ‘bitch’, but they’ll call her “mean” all day long and twice on Sunday.  Calling a woman a bitch for not tolerating bullshit… well, that totes uncool. Calling her mean, is waaaaaaaaaay better.  ’Mean’ sounds sooooooooooo much nicer than ‘bitch’, am I right?

Because your bullshit ain’t cute?

Men are “tough”, not “mean”. DUH.

I, on occasion, have been called “mean”.

I know! Shocking!

What, pray tell, earned me the title of Big Meanie?  Here are a few examples:

  • Doing exactly what my syllabus says I will do.
  • Male coworkers says, “Girls are crazy.”  I respond, “That type of sweeping generalization, especially with it’s sexist overtones, is unacceptable in the workplace.”
  • Having zero fucks to give about the bullshit excuses offered by a sexual harasser.

Apparently, I was supposed to be “sympathetic”, “flexible”, “not so sensitive”, “forgiving”, sugar, spice, and everything nice.

Exactly, Donna, exactly.

A lady is supposed to listen to even the most outrageous shit and be “nice”.   A lady, if she must be critical, should issue flowery feedback.  Women are to gently guide those up to bullshit to the light, ever helpful.

This is real life, yo.

“Mean”? Really?  That is some tone policing, double standard having bullshit.  And it needs to end.

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@DrRubidium
Editor-in-Commandant

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Mean image from here
Cate Blanchett image from here
I Love Lucy image from here
Parks & Rec image from here
Orange Is The New Black image from here
Mean Girls image from here

 

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Mistakes, accidents, and owning your shit

“It was just one mistake…”

Let’s start with the word ‘mistake‘.

Mistake

We’ve all made them.  I’ve made sooooooooo many mistakes – and not just that unfortunate wedge hairdo in the late 1980s.

The key bit with mistakes is we MAKE them. You.  Me.  A mistake is something we did.  Something we did intentionally. I made a decision, probably several, which included committing to a course of action.  Because the word “mistake” is being used, those decisions and that course of action has came back to bite me in the ass.  Technically speaking, what is biting me in the ass are my mistake’s negative consequences.  Those consequences likely suck, and may seem, like, super-harsh – that doesn’t make it any less mine. I  own that shit.  I own all the shit consequences that come with that mistake that I MADE.  Because I MADE it. Intentionally.

“…but it was just one mistake.”  This is often said in the same way one would say, “…it just slipped from my hand.” As if one’s mistake isn’t a mistake, but an accident.

Accident

An ‘accident‘.  We’ve all had these too.  I accidentally fell down a flight of stairs, tearing two ligaments in my ankle. Hurt like a motherfucker and there was physical therapy and medical expenses and… well, you get the idea.

It seems of late, folks are using ‘mistake’ like ‘accident’ to affect a definition change.  Because I’m a cynical meanie, I don’t think it’s because some people don’t know their words.  Nope, I think they’re are trying to get away with bullshit.  They’re angling to avoid or minimize those pesky negative consequences.

Flying Spaghetti Monster knows, the negative consequences of a mistake can really suck.  Well, buckle up, buttercups! Because a mistake means we gambled, we lost, and now we have to pay. The payment may be more than we’d like.  More than we deem fair.  Because when we make a mistake, when we intentionally do something, we’re the one’s that get to decide on the cost of that something.

 

Record Scratch

Oops! My bad. We’re totes not the ones that get to decide the cost of our mistakes. That is perhaps one of the suckiest things about fucking up.

Oh, that’s a tricky one – ‘fair’.  Who get’s to decide what’s ‘fair’? The person that made the mistake? The BFFs of the person that made the mistake? The person or people one’s mistake hurt?  The BFFs of the person or people one’s mistake hurt?  The ombudsman?

Before we all start worrying and arguing over about how much we gotta pay, let’s first acknowledge that we owe. We did that shit, time to own it.

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@DrRubidium
Editor-in-Commandant

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Arrested Development image from here
Definitions are screen captures from http://www.merriam-webster.com
Anne Hathaway image from here
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Let me fix that for you, PBS

PBS has issued an official statement over PBS Digital Studios‘ It’s Okay To Be Smart A Very Special Thanksgiving Special, hosted by host @jtotheizzoe.   [You'll need to scroll to the bottom to see what PBS hath spoken!]

Fear not, Red Ink has made their digital editorial suggestions and comments for PBS Digital Studios and PBS a bit easier to find…

Download (PDF, Unknown)


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@DrRubidium
Editor-in-Commandant

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Editor’s note: Unfortunately, the possibility that Red Ink may actually be more than one person has impacted the quest of JAYFK’s legal department to explore the ramifications of  making the identity – or identities – of Red Ink public knowledge.  As such, legal will cease and desist said quest and exploration.

 

 

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It’s okay to let me fix that for you

When @jtotheizzoe wished us all A Very Special Thanksgiving, it was (UNDER STATEMENT ALERT!) not well-received by a number of people. In response, @jtotheizzoe issued an apology.  Red Ink has issued a LMFTFY

Download (PDF, Unknown)


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@DrRubidium
Editor-in-Commandant

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Editor’s note: JAYFK’s legal department is still exploring the ramifications of making Red Ink‘s identity public knowledge.  I am confident we’ll have an answer soon… if legal remembers to charge their phones, that is…

 

 

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What This Is Really About

Somebody has said or done something messed-up.  To you.  After a bit of processing, you think you’ve figured out how that messed-up thing made you feel.  You think you’ve figured out why somebody said or did that messed-up thing.  You think you’ve figured out what that messed-up thing means in the greater context of things.

Oh, silly you!  You think all your internal reflection, careful consideration, and meaningful conversation with your intimates has enabled you to figure things out?

You know who has IT totally figured out?  You know who can cut through all your silly ramblings to get to the heart of the matter?  You know who can lift you out of your ignorance and into the light of What This Is Really About?

Of course you want to know who can tell you What This Is Really About!  Allow the experts to explain…

First, they’ll tell you what your messed-up thing is not really about.  It’s not really about any of the “-isms” or “-phobias” (racism, sexism, classicism, homophobia, transphobia, etc.).  But, being magnanimous, they’ll let you know that your mistake in thinking that any of the “-isms” or “-phobias” were actually involved is understandable.  You know, because you were in an emotional state and all.

Because What This Is Really About is whatever they say it is.  Not you. Even though this messed-up thing happened TO YOU.  You see, you don’t know best. They do.  And they’re more than happy to educate you as to What This Is Really About.

…because they’ve just trying to help you  by telling you What This Is Really About.

To all of those helpful folks letting us know What This Is Really about…

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@DrRubidium                        @DrIsis
Editor-in-Commandant        Editor-in-Goddess

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Cameron from Modern Family image from here
Joan of Mad Med image from here
Sherlock image from here
Jon Stewart image from here
Top gear image is from here
Loki image is from here
You’re welcome image from here
Brenda from The Closer image from here
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Let me fix that for you, Andrew Maynard

After @monicabyrne13 disclosed her harasser as @BoraZ, @2020Science wrote When to name and shame on Social Media, and when to show compassion…

Red Ink has issued a LMFTFY

Download (PDF, Unknown)


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@DrRubidium
Editor-in-Commandant

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Editor’s noteRed Ink has asked that their name be withheld until JAYFK legal department has fully explored the ramifications of making their identity known. Given that the legal department is currently hosting their weekly flippy cup tournament, that could take a while.

 

 

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Let me fix that for you

In the wake of The SciAm Incident Of 2013@huler wrote On this Blogging Business, and Regarding Scolding.  Red Ink has issued a LMFTFY

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@DrRubidium
Editor-in-Commandant

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Editor’s note: Red Ink has asked that their name be withheld until I check all sources for accuracy.  I will get right on that as soon as my phone is all charged up.

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